sweet sixteen

Talking of tremors

she has a green

bathtub. One day

I filled it. One day

I put old rose petals

in it ,she said she

didn’t mind. Even

when they begun to

rot. She used to

lie in it and watch

me brush my teeth

and when I spat

she looked a

little harder said

why do you get

such a long string.

I’ve had a lot of

mucus ever since

I was sixteen.

She sung me sweet

sixteen in her

green bathtub. I

couldn’t bare to

join her. She

looked at me in

the mirror. My

insides curled open

like flowers. How

they tremble in the

sun. In the rain.

but then she gets

up. Says. Get

these petals off

of me. I have a job.

I have to go.

So I pick them off

gingerly as she

brushes her teeth.

I drain the bath.

Clean it too. Lay

inside ,clothed.

sweet sixteen

on seeing

on seeing, the ground did not immediately

fall,     away

on seeing, it remained still and green

and grass

sway

the sky remained ribbed and

picture

on seeing, the sky was so

blue with the

calm ache

of your your back

to me

of indifference

on seeing, boy you

stretch hands like

you once did on

my lap

you walk with weapons

on seeing, this does not

matter                    , to walk to

own hands

(your hands)

which lingered where they

shouldn’t

on seeing, everything is still

on seeing,     you walk

away from me,

the crime

scene.

and i sit, with the place where

it happened     , wishing

i could

like you

just simply,     walk away

on seeing,         i am the calm

blue ache,

of a body              , invaded.

on seeing

two days deep end

two days deep end my fingers are stained green
smelt of mint and lime
lover smells of garlic cloves and naked ginger
so I buy that after work
as the rain patters down, I shift my turtle neck
for the ghost mouth
which kisses neck then deep end for two days
ginger ache in mine
maybe I am lonely, I say to bottle and I kiss again
it responds in unkind
but the longer I am alone, the more I catch sight
there was a child
she stands in the corner watching me drink
thinks of mother
the way she made Milo, and watermelon ice tea

two days deep end